On My Mind...

... there are many instances that I can think of that makes me want to say,
"I told you so".

But I reckon it's not that nice to hear.

**

Sometimes I feel it's better that I'm not a part of your lives anymore. I just don't see any sense in it anymore. I even think it's a little bit stupid to pretend like I like conversing with you or talk about everything and nothing. I mean, truthfully, I don't mind. But on the other hand, I don't like it. But not in a way that I don't like it. Get what I mean?

Yeah, so whatever it is, I'd much prefer that we lead our separate lives, and we just peer into each other's occasionally. As how we all do just to get by.

Watching and learning that you have an impressive talent sometimes puts me in my place. Because although I've always known that you were good, or even excellent, I've always harboured the fact that I could be better. Why? You outshone me almost all my life.

And finally, when I saw that you made the biggest mistake in your life, it came to me like some sort of lightning revelation that you were actually... normal? Since then, I could conclude that I could be just as good as you are.

If not better.

Just maybe in different things, hm.
**

You mocked me once.
Now I can do the same. Only silently.
You were quite brave to come up to me to tell me off.
But now when I look at you, and the situation you are in.
I can only scoff silently and gloat about how good I have things here in comparison to you.
Afterall, I've been there and done that.
Hopefully also to continue telling the tale.
But you? I'm not so sure. But that may be because I just don't know enough.
But my sources kind of tell me otherwise.

All the best to you

**

You.
pffbt. Not worth mentioning here.

**

I forgive you.
But I still wonder what it would be like if it all didn't happen.
I don't wish for anything more (or less) than what I have now.
But for moments in my waking life, I wonder.
Just sometimes.

And I turn to my side, and see the love of my life,
and I know that it was worth it.

**

Sayang, you are my sunshine :)
My only sunshine
You make me HAPPY,
When skies are grey.
You'll never know, Sayang...
How much I love you :)


xxxxxxx