Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Delayed Gratification

I am tired beyond comprehension.
But my mind races with doubts, questions, ponderings, and just plain awe at everything and anything.

I see baby pictures, wedding pictures, honeymoon pictures, proposal pictures, graduation pictures, party pictures, and I wonder: What the heck am I doing with my life??

I am neither here nor there.
I'm not getting married, pregnant, having a baby, graduating (been there done that yay), nor am I going out having fun, on holidays or anything!

I'm just.... Here.
And have been just "here" for some time now.

I want a new phase.

I figure, if I sit around and wait for it, I'm not going to get it so I'm really pondering seriously about just going to get it for myself. Otherwise, how long will I have to wait? How long will I have to feel so empty?

I've been waiting my whole life already.
Something's gotta give.