uhhhhhhh.. i learn that.. we (as in people) are the experts of our own lives.
i agree la. i mean duh. nobody can be better than me at being ME right?
and then.. i learned that.. in therapy, say.. counseling.. the therapist/counselor cannot tell the client/patient what to do about something. meaning.. if the client has problems with his/her marriage, the therapist/counselor cannot tell the client/patient to get a divorce or go talk to his wife...
ya so basically we hear the client/patient out, and then GUIDE the client/patient to make his OWN decisions. make him think. make him ponder. make him reason. make him use his brainnnnn. make him weight out consequences and list a list of pros and cons..
so lets say you come to me and ask
"how do i deal with bla bla bla? it's so tough bla bla bla"
i can only say:
"what do you THINK you should do? when you see that bla bla bla and bla bla bla has this effect on bla bla bla. what do you THINK is the best way possible to deal with this situation? will it help encourage bla bla bla or will it stir up a fight? do you THINK it will do you any good? how do you see yourself being in charge of this situation?"
i don't think i can tahan loh. always ask him back questions when he ask me one of his own... i mean, i'd be pissed off if i had to ask a question that needed an answer and all i get in return are MORE questions.
this shows i don't like to think. have always been like that since i was a kid. don't like to think for myself one. ppl always have to tell me what to do. even DRINK WATER -_-
people who are gifted in counseling should do counseling, seriously. the world doesn't need any more discontented therapists who don't really care about their client/patients problems but are merely in it for the money and for their OWN plans and agenda for their patients/clients.
i think a counselor/therapist has to have NO PLANS for the patients/clients other than getting the patient/client to a better and safer emotional state.
why did i just tell you this also i don't know.
i wanted to say something like...
knowing how to handle a person is most effective when you KNOW how to handle him WITHOUT him knowing how you handle him...
dunno lah. my thoughts are everywhere.
it's like manipulation but the sort that is acceptable.
like if you want to handle a difficult child right, you pacify the child and tell the child that you will promise him this this this if he sits and stays quiet through a class/ seminar/ course.
but really in fact.. you WON'T give the child what you promised, because you know the child has short term memory loss kinda thing?
i hope i don't deliver my thoughts like this during the exam in May.